I have no particular reason for posting these other than I was cleaning up my document folder and got sucked down the rabbit hole while reading through the years of funny statements that my children have made.
Parenting is hard. But it's also true that parenting is so very rewarding and just plain fun. Reading these reminds me of the joy that my children bring into my life. And laughter. (Because honestly, sometimes it's either laughing or crying. And why not choose the happy tears, right?? : )
Anyway, their outlooks on life also make amazing fodder for Facebook posts which I then collect and keep tucked away in a word document, only to be re-discovered and shared again with you. Enjoy.
One second Meg is screeching, “ahhhhhh!! A bug!! There’s a bug!!!”
Then I hear a WHACK.
Next second Meg comes around the corner holding the baby in a manger from our Little People nativity set above her head and triumphantly announces, “MOM! I just used the baby Jesus to KILL that bug!!” 😳🤣
Well, never doubt the power of Jesus.
Brenn, "I have so many friends at school."
Me, "Yeah? Who are they?
Brenn, "Uh, I don't know their names." (What is it with Brenn and names?!)
Me, "Ok, are they boys or girls?"
Brenn, "Oh, girls. Lot of girls. I have like, um, four girlfriends!"
Me, "wow, you're a busy man."
Brenn, (sigh) "Yes...yes I am." (Pause) "WAIT! MOM! They aren't my GIRLFRIENDS!!!" 😂
Today at lunch Jack took a giant bite of food right before Paul started praying. Paul paused and said, “Jack! You ignored me when I said that we were about to pray and took a bite anyway! What do you call that type of action???” (He was shooting for “disrespectful.”) Jack, looking super guilty, swallowed and just stared at us.
Following an uncomfortable silence, little Meg leaned toward Jack and stage whispered, “Say ‘DISOBEDIENCE.’ Say THAT, Jack.” 😂😂😂😂😂
So the boys have been particularly unhelpful today (on a day where I needed help.) Long story short, they ended up cleaning bathrooms followed by a lecture followed by a time out due to their actions. I just went upstairs to lift the time out and Brenn looked at me with big sad eyes and said, "Mom, I just want to say that--" I cut him off and said, "I don't want an apology Brenn. Not yet. I want to see some change in your behavior. Ok?"
He nodded but said, "Oh, uh, well I wasn't going to apologize....I'm just hungry and want a snack. Is that ok?" Sigh. 🤦♀️Failure, you appear to me like a bag of fruit snacks when what I expected was a heartfelt apology.
Meg stomps into my room this morning and growls (literally!), “MOM. Jack is RUINING my life. Ruining!!” (Big huffy sigh and hands placed in hips.) I say, “huh, how is he doing that?” (Another big huffy sigh.) “I tried to turn off the light [in their room] and he said, ‘Wait a minute!!!’” Then she growls again, “oh he just wants to ruin my life.......” 😏😆 Ruination indeed. Can life get any worse.
I had just talked to the boys about a big, serious topic with lots of emotional implications while driving to school. There was a period of silence and when I looked in the rear view mirror I noticed that Jack had this really pensive, slightly confused look on his face. Feeling concerned and like a significant parenting moment lay in front of me I very gently I asked him what was on his mind at that moment. He glanced at me and said......
"Oh. I was just thinking about potatoes..."
(POTATOES?!?!)
"...and how many different cultures use them in their diets. That's probably because they are very filling. Right? I mean, I really like them and they fill ME up."
Sigh. Well. I guess we don't need to worry about Jack's emotional stability so much as his carbohydrate intake.
Paul and I were discussing the possibility of getting a dog while Meg was standing beside us. Paul turned to Meg and asked what kind of dog she’d like to have. Meg thought for a second, scrunched up her face and said, “well...I DON’T want a DEAD one.”😯🤣
Meg was snoozing in her car seat while I was driving. I noticed that she woke up and was sitting still, just staring ahead with a concentrated look on her face. Bad dream perhaps?? Then she broke the silence with, "Mama, you are going to die" quickly followed by a whispered, pitiful, "...and I will be left alone."
Me: "Oh, no baby...if I die then someone will come and take care of you!"
(Pause)
Meg: "like aunt Margaret?"
Me: "sure baby"
(Longer pause)
Meg: "Ok mama. You can die."
😳 😳 😳 😳 😳 😳
(and I am left feeling just a little disturbed.)
Irony defined: When in one room a mother is diligently reading a book on how to be a grace-filled parent and in another a sneaky son is using a chair and fishing net to try and snag a box of crackers from the top shelf of a pantry and instead knocks over a bottle of olive oil which breaks on impacts, releasing it's rapidly spreading contents to conquer the kitchen floor. #besureyoursinwillfindyouout #butitsstillmomwhohastocleanitup
Meg just looked at my arms and critically declared, "wow, you have big elbows Mama." 😜 😜 😜
As a reward for finishing their swimming classes I got the boys milk shakes. Brenn asked for strawberry, Jack for hot fudge. After his first sip jack disgustedly said, "hey! This tastes like chocolate!" I said, "fudge IS chocolate, Jack." Pause. Then, in a snooty voice, "oh....well, they still messed up because this hot fudge milkshake isn't hot AT ALL." Me, "Ummmm, that's bc it's ice cream." Sigh. Jack: Brilliant, but also not brilliant 🙄 🙄 🙄
Meg ran (limped?) up to my chair whimpering, "Momma...I got hurt sooo baaaad" while lifting up her leg and placing it in my lap. I dutifully began inspecting said leg while making soothing, non-committal statements about ice and bandaids and rest. After a second Meg states "Momma, that's not the leg that hurts. Why are you checking it?" 🙄 🙄
OK, I feel like if she can't even place the right "injured" appendage in my lap for healing, I shouldn't be expected to continue with the tender ministrations, right??
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